Mother of a Man-Child

My life with teenage boys

Understanding Women – Tips for Men-Children February 10, 2012

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A (male) colleague sent me some information the other day that I thought was incredibly accurate.  It was called “Nine words women use” and described perfectly nine phrases often used by women and the real meaning behind each phrase (kindly translated for men).  Naturally I sent it to Father of a Man-Child and also several girlfriends.  It wasn’t until my blogging friend Mother Who Works suggested I share this wisdom with the Men-Children that I thought to publish it for the benefit of an even wider group.

So here you are, a rare but useful insight into women, the words they use, and what they really mean!

NINE WORDS WOMEN USE

  1. Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
  2. Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour.  Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
  3. Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
  4. Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!
  5. Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
  6. That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
  7. Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add in a clause here – This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ – that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’. That will bring on a ‘whatever’).
  8. Whatever: Is a woman’s way of saying F– YOU!
  9. Don’t worry about it, I’ll do it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to # 3.

If you find this rings true, feel free to share this wisdom with men and/or men-children you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology.  More than likely they won’t remember it, but like Pavlov’s salivating dogs, they will learn over time what each phrase actually means.

Of course you can also share it with your female friends, who will enjoy a knowing smile, because they recognise just a little bit of themselves in it. 🙂

 

Back to School!! February 3, 2012

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twins at schoolAs our unusual “summer” enters its final month, the kids this week returned to school.  And we returned to the daily grind of making lunches, 6am rowing starts, music lessons, and countless loads of washing every week – I haven’t missed it I can tell you.  Nor the peak hour traffic that results!  Whilst there was no excitement evident amongst the men-children as they headed back to school, I know they were happy to return and catch up with their mates after a few months off.  And they’re both pretty pumped about a big year of sport in Year 10.  (Let’s hope it’s also a big year of study for both of them!)

It seems every newspaper carries a mandatory image of twins or triplets or even better quads in school uniform, as they head to school for their first prep year.  It reminds me of our own front page photo of the men-children some 10 years ago (that’s it pictured for you) which was pretty exciting at the time, and really is a great moment to have captured for posterity.  I still remember the boys wearing their school uniforms home from the store, such was their thrill at owning one.  And of course the pride I felt whilst blinking back tears as we stood in the prep classroom and launched them on their school journey.  No less joyful was repeating it all 7 years later with our daughter.  They are moments you could relive a thousand times over and each would be as wonderful as the first!

In contrast to the boys, Sister of a Man-Child’s excitement was palpable at entering Year 3.  She even sent me a text message yesterday when she got home “Hay (sic) mum first day of school great.  Thumbs up”, complete with thumbs up images!  Now before you think our 8-year-old daughter has a mobile phone, not quite.  For Christmas she was lucky enough to get an iPod Touch (as a modern-day alternative to the Nintendo DS).  Whilst most people would think she would use it for music, it comes with so many other features she’s barely had the earphones on.  Why would you when it also has countless games free from the App store, a camera better than mine, access to YouTube, and most importantly the ability to text (via iMessage) and use Facetime with other iPhone/iPod users.  The ONLY thing it doesn’t do is make phone calls – seriously.  So when Ruby’s in a wireless environment, she’s practically got her own iPhone.  A “Digital Native” in the making!

emoji imagesShe recently found some friends with iPods or iPhones, and now they’re madly texting each other and doing Facetime.  The only issue is that Ruby doesn’t have her own email address, so she’s using one of mine.  As a result, all her messaging appears automatically on my phone too.  It was fascinating to observe the conversation unfold between three young girls, and see them helping each other text and use Facetime.  And then installing Emoji (an app for texting icons).  Now they seem to send each other hundreds of smiley faces and other images.  Although the other morning I was sitting at work with a stream of messages (complete with sound notifications) going off at my desk which got a little out of hand.  I ended up joining the conversation and asking them to stop, which took a while because we had to convince one of the girls that it really was the “Mother” texting.  Not surprisingly, we have now banned the use of the iPod before school and not until after homework is done in the evenings – like all fun and highly addictive “toys”, good in moderation.

So back to school and back to the routine.  And back to family meals which are a nice change, especially since during the holidays we rarely had both men-children at home for a meal.  No doubt the novelty will wear off quickly!! 🙂

 

It’s quiet without the Men-Children January 27, 2012

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Australian FlagIt’s been a quiet week on the Man-Child front.  They headed off last week for five nights at a school rowing camp on the Tambo River.  It coincided with the hottest week of our summer so far  – just as well they were on water.  No doubt the next hottest one will be when the kids get back to school next week.  Isn’t that always the way?

I can’t tell you much about it – as is usual you don’t hear from them when they’re away unless you prompt them.  Father of a Man-Child was pretty active with texts and probably got a bit more information out of them.   He wanted to know how they were rowing, and if they were improving their times and winning.  I wanted to know if they were getting sunburnt and wearing hats!  Naturally we were both keen to hear all about it when they came home.

I left an Australia Day BBQ to pick them up on their return, only to drop them off home and head back to the party.  So we only had a quick debrief in the car – they admitted they were stuffed and keen to get home.  They said the camp was good, but hard – the healing blisters on their hands being testament to that!  5.30am starts, 3 rowing sessions a day, typical camp food.   Home to their own beds and a nice home-cooked meal by Mum – what bliss I thought.

By the time we returned from our party the boys were long gone – off to catch up with mates and girlfriends.  So much for tired!!! And so much for wanting a meal….probably hankering after some junk food anyway.   So any good camp stories will have to wait until next week – we should get some out of them over the dinner table tonight.

Sister of a Man-Child thoroughly enjoyed the week without her brothers. It’s probably a nice treat to have Mum and Dad all to yourself.  I expect the main thing she enjoyed was the quietness in the house – no arguing, no fighting, no screaming Mother, and when I bought a packet of hot cross buns they actually lasted the week and not 24 hours (you’ve got to be fast in our place normally).

So a belated Happy Australia Day to all.  We had a wonderful day with friends embracing the true meaning of the public holiday and celebrating our fortune to live in the lucky country.

 

The Parent-Child Power Struggle January 20, 2012

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There comes a point when you realise that it’s a lost cause. That whatever you say will be ignored, and that you are powerless as a parent to control your child anymore. Now in an ideal world, that would be when they are 18 years old, and fair enough too, since legally they are an adult (not necessarily mentally) and you really can’t stop them from doing what they want.

However, as a parent, I have long maintained a couple of principles:

  • Whilst our children are under 18 years old they are our responsibility and really should do what we say
  • Whilst our children live under our roof, they will abide by or at least respect our rules and our house (and it goes without saying respect us), even after they are 18 years old

So how was it that I found myself in the kitchen on Sunday night, with an almost 16-year-old, about to enter into one of the above mentioned no-win conversations? It transpired because after five days away with mates, bringing back a couple of tired men-children from the beach, I stated that Man-Child II was not to ask to go to his girlfriend’s house the minute we got home, as he was clearly tired and in need of a good night’s sleep in his own bed (you may recall he stays at his girlfriend’s house on occasion, against our wishes, as he sleeps in her room apparently)!!!!

No sooner had we walked in the door, than Man-Child II was in my ear.

  • “Hey Mum, I know you said “no”, but can I go to (insert GF’s name) house?”
  • “No you can’t” I tell him. “Don’t go there, we’ve covered this already.”
  • “But Why?” is the response, and the badgering continues for the next 10 minutes in the kitchen, as I’m trying to prepare dinner and get us all unpacked and ready to head to work the next day, whilst Father of a Man-Child is getting Sister of a Man-Child organised.

Now I could swear I had told him in advance that he should not even ask, but what does he do? He not only asks, he nags. And nags, and nags. As he nags, and I hear “But Why” another 10 times, my blood pressure escalates. Now many parents will know this trick, even those of a toddler throwing a tantrum – he’s trying to get me to declare in frustration “Okay, whatever, do what you want”, thereby allowing him to win, hands down, and get his own way. I am determined this will not be the case, so in my absolute frustration do you know what I did? As I was head in the fridge looking for dinner ingredients, I suddenly yanked a full cask of wine out of the fridge and threw it at him (I know, loads of self-control!!).

The cask actually hit him (no harm done) then sadly ricocheted off his arm, hitting the floor and splitting the bladder wide open, emptying the contents under various pieces of furniture. If you’ve never seen a very angry, very frustrated mother, trust me, it’s not a pretty sight. A few swear words later, and some pointed phrases directed at Man-Child II, and I set about cleaning up the mess I had made. Just Fabulous!!!! The rest of the household ducked for cover pretty quickly. Yes I know, it serves me right, but it was not what I needed. And I’m sure the neighbours didn’t really enjoy the entertainment going on next door – but then again????

Do you know what Man-Child II did? He left anyway. He says after Father of a Man-Child and his Man-Child brother had a crack at him (rightly so for causing the fracas), he’d had enough and so felt it was quite acceptable to leave the house (that’s teenage post-rationalisation for you isn’t it?). A pointed exchange via mobile phone then ensued, with multiple threats made by me and then by Father of a Man-Child. Thereafter, I didn’t speak to him for two days (he didn’t come home anyway) and he was seriously in our bad books. Eventually, we insisted he return home, and I did manage to extract a rather pathetic apology from him.

Father of a Man-Child and I have since agreed he needs a good talking to, so he understands that this approach to running his own life at his age is not acceptable, and not going to work while he lives in our house. My view is simple: if he wants to run his own life, he can leave school, get a job, move out, and then do what he wants. Now that would be interesting wouldn’t it?

I spoke to another parent just recently, who experienced similar challenges with his teenage son. He’s just coming out the other side now, but he said it’s been damn hard, and he provided some valuable tips about how to deal with these situations to avoid the instant blow-ups. Of course, avoiding the instant blow-ups might be easier if Mother of a Man-Child didn’t have such a fiery Irish temper…..will need to work on that clearly.

If you’re wondering why I am sharing this story with you, rather than avoid the embarrassment, I guess I thought you should know that I am really just a normal mother, with normal children, who is a long way from perfect, and feels much better admitting that it probably wasn’t the best behaviour on my part, and no doubt I’ll be laughing about it one day soon.

 

Post-Script to Home Alone January 13, 2012

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beersOkay, I admit it.  Perhaps the men-children are more mature than I thought?  After leaving them at home alone last weekend, unsupervised for 48 hours, it appears that nothing untoward took place, and our house remains unscathed.  Maybe, just maybe, the boys can be trusted more than I have given them credit for?  Then again, maybe they just know that the price of failing our trust test was just too great, so they chose to toe the line?

Father of a Man-Child made the decision to tell one of the boys of our absence mid afternoon on Friday.  He said we were away Friday night and POSSIBLY Saturday night but we weren’t sure (sneaky I know).  In a twist of fortune quite frankly, his brother didn’t know until about 6pm when we were well on our way to our destination, and far too late for him to organise anything significant. 🙂

Father of a Man-Child also left strict written instructions for them (then they can’t say they didn’t understand what you said can they?):

  • No sleep overs allowed with no parents present
  • No gatherings of more than 5 people (read per man-child)
  • No alcohol permitted with no parents present
  • Curfew of 12.30am for all friends to leave our home

We sent a couple of text messages, just to establish their movements on Friday night – both home, alone, very boring indeed.  On Saturday afternoon, a casual text arrives from one of the boys:  “Are you coming back tonight?” instantly sending one’s imagination into overdrive as you would expect.

We discussed the response options open to us:

  • Yep, we’ll be home later today (thereby killing any party plans, whether or not we actually planned to arrive home)
  • Not sure, we’ll let you know later (ditto above)
  • Why, are you planning something you shouldn’t be? (like he would tell us)
  • No, we are staying another night.  We could bullshit you but instead we are trusting you.  Don’t let us down (that was my actual response)!!

So, we decided to trust them, and we decided to let them have some fun.  We actually rang them late on Saturday night (yep, mid party) to speak to both of them.  One had a few mates over, and one had his usual “harem” of girls over (including his girlfriend of course).  It all sounded under control, with no slurring of their words evident, so at least we didn’t need to panic.  Whilst we had requested that they have no sleepovers in our absence, we also confirmed with both of them that they were indeed having a couple of mates to stay – yep, totally inconsistent, but how exactly were we planning on enforcing it from 3 hours away?  At least that way we knew what was happening.

We arrived home to a relatively normal house.  No signs of it being cleaned to within an inch of it’s life, no breakages, no empties lying about, nothing really out of the ordinary.  Father of a Man-Child says he found a few “rollie” stubs in the backyard – and promptly threw out the evidence before I could do the smell test!!!  He thinks they were smoking tobacco – I am not quite so sure….

Our neighbour dropped by and actually complemented the boys on being well behaved in our absence.  As a father (survivor) of two boys who are both now past their teens, I found that very comforting indeed.

So there you have it.  I know it’s not very exciting blog material is it?  It would make for a much better read if there was a scandalous story about some wild party at our house, with major mishaps thrown in for good measure.  But then again, it’s also a refreshing change, and a sign that perhaps my little darlings are coming of age, slowly but surely, and that there is a small but visible light glowing at the end of the adolescent tunnel. 🙂

In case you missed the pre-cursor to this story, you can read it here:  Men-Children alone in the house for a weekend 

 

Men-Children alone in the house for a weekend? January 6, 2012

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Happy New Year to all my readers.  I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas.  Well the Griswold Family have just returned from a great short holiday in Sydney.  We did all the tourist icons with the kids – Harbour Bridge, Opera House, The Rocks, Darling Harbour, Westfield Eye Tower, Bondi Beach, Manly Beach and Luna Park amongst others.  There’s no doubt being a tourist is hard work – it’s quite an exhausting holiday, but satisfying nevertheless.

Highlights for the Men-Children included doing the bridge climb (highly recommended) and jet-boating on the harbour, and for Sister of a Man-Child it was a photo with Maxy, one of the famous Bondi Rescue surf life savers, Luna Park, and seeing the NYE fireworks over the Harbour Bridge.  Much to the boys’ disappointment their plans for NYE didn’t quite work out as they hoped (they tried trust me), so they spent the night with us and our friends.  It wasn’t all bad as we were harbour-side to watch the Sydney fireworks and it’s not every year you get the chance to do that.  And we did buy them some alcohol so they could share in the festivities (Jim Beam & Cola being their drink of choice – Yuk!).  I have no doubt that will be the last NYE they will ever spend with us – and eventually just like us they will realise it’s a highly over rated night.

Having returned home, we’re all still in holiday mode and planning further escapes during January.  They boys have invitations to go beach-side with friends, and more sport camps so that should keep them occupied until school returns.  When an opportunity came up for a couple of weekends away with Sister of a Man-Child we both jumped at it.  One of the weekends was cleverly co-ordinated to coincide with the boys’ absence.  However, only at the last minute did we realise that heading away this weekend meant leaving the boys home alone.  And we hadn’t really thought about organising an alternative.

A couple of thoughts sprang to mind about how we might approach our absence:

  • Don’t tell them until the last minute, so they can’t plan anything.  (Or maybe don’t mention it at all and see if they call us to find out where we are – a bit of role reversal?)
  • Tell the neighbours to keep an eye on them and let us know if an impromptu party of 200 teenagers eventuates.
  • Threaten death if anything happens to the house.
  • Tell them we’ll be home on Saturday night (when it’s really Sunday night).
  • Ask the aunties to do drive-bys (do you think every hour is overkill?)
  • Panic!

The latter happened when I chatted to my twin sister and we both recalled the first time our parents left us at home for a weekend and “trusted us to do the right thing”.  Well, you can guess what happened can’t you?  Within 2 minutes of them leaving the house, we were on the phone to our mates organising a party.  And a great party it was, followed naturally by us cleaning the house to within an inch of its life.  A sure giveaway don’t you think?

Of course we got sprung – nothing to do with the stench of smoke and alcohol that I am sure permeated the entire house, or the motorbike divets left on the front lawn by someone’s boyfriend (I seem to recall his name was “Moose”).  My father (“hawk-eye”) wondered who had moved the fridge?  For God’s sake, who would have thought?  Naturally it wasn’t something we noticed was it? We blamed Moose – a mammoth of a man, and the only one big enough to do it!   I can’t recall the exact punishment metered out for this particular crime; there were quite a few over our teenage years.  We were probably grounded for a year or two, or perhaps it was the time when our invitation to go skiing with the neighbours to babysit their daughter was declined, much to our immense disappointment (and just quietly to our parents relief I suspect).

So as I post this, we will be on the road to our weekend away, and the boys will be “free” for the weekend.   If you should happen to see anything on Facebook about a party at our place, please let me know urgently (they’re not my friends on FB remember). 🙂

 

Mother of a Man-Child’s Top 10 Posts December 23, 2011

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As I post this week, I am celebrating a small milestone – 100 posts by Mother of a Man-Child.  Every Friday, for almost two years now, I have shared a little story about our life with the Men-Children (and not to be forgotten Sister of a Man-Child).

It all began with this story (All In Good Taste), which was really the inspiration for my blog in the first place.  I was so outraged at the behaviour of my teenage son, and no doubt the lack of control that I was facing, that it suddenly occurred to me to write about my experience, in order to vent my frustration, and for my own amusement.

I have had almost 6,000 views of my blog in that time, from a small but growing audience.  I have rarely been short of material, thanks solely to the Men-Children who are a constant source of inspiration for my writing.  I have also thoroughly enjoyed the comments from you, my readers, and the regular feedback.  It’s always nice to know people enjoy reading my stories. 🙂

To celebrate my little milestone, here’s 10 of my favourite posts.  The ones that caught my eye as I recalled what we’ve endured and/or survived over the last two years.  As it’s Christmas and we’re off on another Griswald Family Holiday, I’ll be having a short break from Mother of a Man-Child, but I’ll return early in 2012, no doubt with some more news of the Men-Children’s adventures from our next holiday!  Enjoy.

  1. Argue this logic (boys are NOT on the same wave-length as their Mother)
  2. Uninvited guests after midnight (what happens when you find four strange girls in your home at 3am)
  3. An arresting story (a close call for a shop-lifting man-child)
  4. The self-tattooing trend (sometimes teenagers are idiots)
  5. New Years Eve at Portsea (like Mother like Son, the attraction remains)
  6. A Princess Tale (a story about Sister of a Man-Child, in sharp contrast to the Men-Children)
  7. Sleeping over at a GIRL’S house (at 14 not my ideal scenario)
  8. Freezing on Cadet camp (a lesson learned for our stubborn man-child)
  9. Plains, Trains and Automobiles (what happens when your man-child is stuck in Adelaide for a week)
  10. Drug and Alcohol Education (our first experience with a dope-smoking son)

As always, feel free to share my posts with friends or relatives (or a publisher if you know one!).

Wishing you all a safe and happy Christmas and a wonderful start to 2012.

‎ ‎

 

From Boys to Bogans? December 16, 2011

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rats tail hairIn what can only be described as a worrying trend, I think my men-children are showing Bogan tendencies.  The only comfort I can take in this is that they are not alone.  In fact they are joining a growing number of their school friends with body piercings and a “ratty” hairstyle which seems to be the current trend.

For those of us old enough to remember, the “ratty” style harks from the disgusting “rats tail” trend that was worn by Bogans in the 80’s.  They would cut their hair short, with the exception of a long piece of hair that was left at the nape of the neck.  It was often plaited for effect (and not any prettier trust me), and sadly was a trans-gender style worn by Bogan men and women alike!!  If I am honest I may have had a VERY SMALL ratty myself which was very tasteful of course at the height of this trend. 🙂

One of the men-children recently had his brother use the clippers to cut his hair, leaving a delightful “ratty” at the back.  Fortunately, it’s not quite as long as the original version, more a short stumpy version, but nevertheless quite ridiculous.  Apparently it’s all the rage at school, and most likely they are emulating many of the young footballers, who all sport similar styles.  Now I think of it, most of them are Bogans at heart aren’t they?

Our other man-child has recently renewed his requests (read badgering) to be allowed an eyebrow piercing.  The last time he asked, we did suggest he could have one if he chose to have his private parts pierced simultaneously.  This time, he started quoting the fact that at 16 years old he could do as he pleased in relation to body piercing (a fact I must check).  Father of a Man-Child, for reasons completely unfathomable to all of us, seems to think a tattoo is a much better idea???  Even the man-child couldn’t understand this logic, and I don’t think his father was using reverse psychology.   Let’s face it, at least you can take out the stud from your eyebrow, but the tattoo on your arm or leg is slightly more permanent!  And whilst the school should BAN all visible piercings in my view, it seems they will allow a clear stud in one’s eyebrow whilst in uniform.  We did try to encourage piercing the earlobe over the eyebrow, but he seems adamant on the latter.

I do recall my nephews now in their mid-20’s both had piercings in their eyebrows shortly after they left school, a fact that their Mother and Grandfather were both appalled by.  God only knows how that same Grandfather will respond to the almost 16 year old man-child having one when he attends the same school his Grandfather did, and where the latter currently enjoys a well-earned reputation.  Oh dear.

So it seems I have a couple of Bogan men-children.  Given the odd hair styles I have seen created by their friends at our house, I have no doubt my boys are not alone in pursuing their “individual” styles, which are really just designed to ensure they conform with all their teenage friends, and demonstrate some anti-establishment, rebellious behaviour like we all did a few decades ago.

I promise to share photos if and when the eyebrow finally gets pierced!

Read our last discussion about eyebrow piercings here.

 

The results are in! December 9, 2011

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studyExams are done.  School is out.  By the time this post is published the men-children will have completed Year 9 and the school reports will be in an envelope on their way home to us.  Time for a stiff drink!

Actually following the exam results, which we received earlier this week, it has to be said the receipt of the school report is somewhat of an anti-climax.  Especially the end-of-year report, when discussions of improvements that can be made are based on the year 2012, which to men-children about to embark on two months of holidays must seem an eternity away.  Nevertheless, we always diligently note the marks, and read the comments, as the latter are by far the most telling indicator of real performance and application in my view.  As we have long maintained, it’s not the marks but the effort that we are interested in.

As an aside, do you remember when you were a kid how LONG it seemed for Christmas to arrive each year, and the long hot summer holidays that seemed to go forever?  Perhaps it was my idyllic childhood, growing up in a suburban street full of kids, allowed to roam all day, coming and going from house to house just to quench our thirst or satisfy our hunger, before we headed back down to the “creek” to feed horses, or climb trees, or ride our bikes (yep, Doncaster was almost the “Greenfields” back then).  No fear of strangers, or need for mobile phones which our parents could contact us on – just the simple freedoms that kids should enjoy as part of an innocent and healthy childhood.

Anyway, back to the men-children.  For those who are wondering about the exams results, and their impact on our bank balance (you may recall we openly BRIBED them earlier this year), we are currently $400 poorer.  That equates to four “B” results on the exams at $100 each.  And you may wonder how the money was earned – well, in fact one man-child earned $400 and one earned $0.  C’est la vie!  Both are smart enough to have had equal opportunity to earn the money (up to $600 each was at stake).  However, one is not the best student (read lazy, and/or disengaged with the academic learning approach) so not surprisingly he didn’t do very well.  As I said to them, you both got the marks (and the money) you deserved.  I was somewhat bemused by the man-child who even convinced a teacher to give him an extra ½ mark so he would achieve the B grade, thereby earning himself an extra $100!!!  I think he’ll go a long way somehow. :}

You might ask if we’re surprised at the results?  I suppose not, especially following a meeting at school to warn us to expect bad results for one man-child.  We’re probably more disappointed that he didn’t achieve his best, and is wasting the opportunities he has at school.  (We won’t be the first or the last parent to think that about their child!!)  And we did actually want to give them the money, as it’s a nice way to end the year and start the holidays.  The man-child with $0 earnings was smart enough to pick up some work with a mate’s dad, so at least he’ll earn some beer money in the run up to Christmas.  Don’t feign shock I called it “beer” money will you – we’ve all been teenagers!

So there you have it – Year 9 gone, just like that.  The Men-Children are now closer to 16 than 15, a fact that scares me every day.  I hope they enjoy the break, and I hope they look back on their summer holidays with the same fondness I did in years to come.


 

We survived another school year (not without incident) December 2, 2011

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school booksFor all parents, the end of the school year is looming.  In no time the kids will all be on holidays for about two months (we workers can only wish), wondering what to do with themselves, and bleeding the parental ATM dry.

We survived the end of year exams, although the results are not in yet.  But that in itself is a major triumph, especially since we were at the school only a few weeks ago for a meeting to discuss one of the men-children and basically to receive a warning that his results would not be good.  (I really hope they’re wrong and we’re pleasantly surprised – is that naive or just optimistic?).  They basically told us that whilst they couldn’t fault our son’s commitment to sport at school, he needed to show similar commitment to academic subjects.  They, like most other mainstream schools, make no apologies for being an academic school first, with a multitude of other “opportunities” second.  It seemed a little late to be telling us this to be honest, although it didn’t come as a complete surprise.  You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink!  (Ditto homework).

Following our “meeting” we tried to ensure the men-children made the most of weekend study time.  That basically meant curtailing their social lives for two weekends and not allowing them out on a Saturday night.  As they still had serious sporting commitments, this wasn’t actually a bad idea in our minds.  However, in the eyes of men-children, spending a Saturday night at home with your parents is about the worst thing you can do.  Honestly, you should have heard the carry on.  You would have thought we’d asked them to walk naked down Glenferrie Road after school.

We also received some interesting correspondence from the school during the year about an “incident” involving both our men-children.  I can’t help but love the tone of carefully crafted letters to parents that are so politically correct in describing an event.  So the “serious incident” that involved a number of boys (including ours), followed “ongoing negative interactions” and “verbal interplay”, resulting in a “physical interaction” breaking out between some boys.  In other words a bunch of testosterone-laden boys who had been egging each other on all year finally had a shit fight and tried to punch the crap out of each other.  Thankfully both of our boys were deemed to be fringe dwellers only, and one was even credited with helping break up the fight. He later admitted that he’d actually managed to land a great punch, and even accidentally slugged one of his mates (LOL).  All part of being boys especially at an all boy’s school.  Of course I completely understand the school’s need to write a letter to all involved, and I’m thankful that ours didn’t do anything too bad.

As for how they’ll amuse themselves over the holidays – thankfully we love camps, and so do they!  Especially the summer camps and sporting camps that the school offer.  They will both be away before Christmas and again in late January.  We think it’s great for them to get away with mates on camp, and also to have time away from us.  We (that’s Father of a Man-Child, Sister of a Man-Child and myself) also enjoy the unusual dynamic that a house with a single child brings.  It’s incredibly quiet and we seem to enjoy spontaneous outings more frequently!!!

So onto the end of Year 9 and exam results next week.  You may recall the bribe we handed to the boys earlier this year – $100 for every B grade or better in their exams.  I suspect one will have a windfall shortly, and the other will be looking for lots of odd jobs he can do over the holidays. 🙂

Read about the bribery here.