Man-Child I recently ventured to the Spring Carnival. This was the second year he’d attended the races, this year on his own with some mates. Off he went looking every bit the dandy – gel in hair, pink shirt and tie and his navy pin-striped suit. A suit that cost him $20 at the opp-shop – don’t you love it!
Of course when the idea of the races was initially raised, it was first of all about securing a ticket. And not just any ticket, of course it had to be one that got you into the member’s section, and all the right car parks. Fortunately, my father is a member and so was able to purchase one for him – so step one of the plan was achieved.
Second step of the plan was what to wear – no questions here. Every 14-year-old boy in the members is decked out in a suit – and Man-Child I had similar intentions. Unfortunately for me, the suit he’d worn two years ago was just a little too tight owing to a massive, but natural growth spurt (even Warwick Capper wouldn’t have worn it).
This first suit I actually picked up at an opp shop for $20, when Man-Child I needed it for a Year 6 school play. I couldn’t believe when I found it, because it literally was a boy’s suit, rather than a man’s suit. It fitted him like a glove – if I’d told someone it was tailor-made they would have believed me. In Year 6, you can imagine all his mates thought his suit was awesome, and therefore all started visiting opp shops to find their own suits – alas to no avail.
Wind the clock forward, we’re now at a nice private school, with some moneyed friends, and the opp-shop option, or god forbid “borrowing” one is now apparently out of the question!!! Grrrr. My case was not helped by Father of a Man-Child telling him of course he could hire a suit so he looked like the stud he is and could pick up chics at the races. Fabulous! That’s male bonding for you. Of course neither of them remembered it cost $80 for the privilege.
So off goes Man-Child I with a mate to hire said suit after I reluctantly agreed. Naturally I receive the call about five minutes later from the store. He doesn’t want the $80 plain black suit, he wants the $130 pin-stripe suit – I just HATE being fleeced. Again, I reluctantly agree, recalling myself how important it is to look good and fit in when you’re 14. He proudly shows me at home what he’s hired. His mate is fortunate that his parents have agreed to buy him one as he had a few functions he can wear it to in coming months.
However, to Man-Child I’s absolute credit, and my delight, he tells me a day later he’s found a suit he thinks will fit – at an opp-shop. I am thrilled – not just at saving money, but that he actually considered this was an option and got off his butt to look. I asked if his friend was with him at the time, he admitted no, but was not at all too proud to tell him of his great find. So he’s both smart and humble – now we’re getting somewhere people!!
Father of a Man-Child was able to check it out the next day and it turns out it was a pretty decent suit for $20. So he bought it on the spot. Now I must admit, by the time we paid for it to be dry-cleaned, and have the pants taken up and in at the waist a little, it set us back about $80 all up. But for $80 Man-Child I now has a suit that will do him (or Man-Child II for that matter) for the next two years. You don’t have to be Einstein to know we’re way ahead already. And just quietly, I’m pretty miffed that common sense prevailed at the end of the day. Just one of many lessons to be learned.
PS. Post a long Saturday at the races, and a rather social Sunday for Man-Child I, he complained he was tired on Sunday evening and couldn’t possibly attend school rowing training on Monday morning with a 6am start. He learned another quick lesson from me – your choice to have a busy social life does not mean you can elect to avoid any other responsibilities, especially school! Who lets’ their kids get away with this stuff?
I was interested, but alas not surprised, to read a story on news.com.au this week about a particular suburb in Western Sydney. The story made headlines because one weekend police had set about rounding up all the roaming kids one Saturday night and subsequently sent no less than 55 young teenagers home to their parents.
At the risk of sounding prudish, let me declare up front – I don’t think my 14-year-old son should be allowed to sleep at his girlfriend’s house! There, I’ve said it. If you don’t agree with me, that’s perfectly fine. You are entitled to your opinion, and me mine. Am I the product of my parents? Absolutely! I’m a positive mini-me of them, right down to the fact that my men-children get away with not much, and I am “extremely strict” according to my boys.
Any parent of a teenager is probably all to familiar with the habits of their offspring – enclosed in their bedroom, prostrate on the floor or bed, laptop computer locked permanently to Facebook, mobile phone beside them with the constant sound of incoming text messages, and the blaring of 200 decibels of their favourite music!
I am sure you all know the Aretha Franklin song – “R.E.S.P.E.C.T. Want to know what it means to me? “ etc. As a child of the 80’s disco era I am all too familiar with that song, and spent my early youth singing it at the top of my lungs and dancing enthusiastically to it. Unfortunately it seems, my men-children are not at all familiar with the song, and indeed it’s message.
Like most teenagers, my men-children spend their weekends out and about with friends, in preference to being at home (especially if the “rents” (parents) are about!). We are lucky if we even find out when they are leaving the house, let alone where they might be going, with whom, and when they’ll return (normally for dinner – after all a bloke’s gotta eat right?).
Sometimes I wonder about my men-children, and whether or not their brains have completely departed their bodies temporarily. The say that the effect of the raging hormones in teenagers bodies can have certain physiological impacts, such as partial deafness (actually I think that’s a long-term male condition called “selective hearing”), or that gangly awkwardness you see in boys whose limbs are growing faster than they should, and they develop an uncoordinated gait.
As a parent, I am one of those who reads child-rearing books, openly shares issues with other parents for support, and/or sympathy and to compare notes (hence the blog I suppose), and seeks objective advice from relevant professionals when appropriate – my logic being the more help I can get the better my chances for success.
Mother of a Man-Child 
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