Mother of a Man-Child

Who remembers Festival Hall?  That iconic place for performing Australian rock bands, enjoyed by generations of Melburnians over the years, including yours truly at a memorable 1979 Split Enz concert.

Wind the clock forward 30 odd years, and Man-Child I is asking me if he can attend a U18 concert with mates at Festival Hall next month.  No problems, it all sounds above-board, legitimately run etc etc, so yes he can go.  Next thing you know, as I’m halfway through making dinner, fielding calls/emails on the mobile phone, answering a million questions from 7-year-old daughter at the end of a school day, next thing I’ve got a 14-year-old boy with the laptop wanting to order the concert ticket online.  And rather than telling him to try coming back in 3 hours when it’s a little quieter, idiot mother drops everything and completes the online order, putting dinner (and my first sip of wine) off for another 10 minutes.   How do they manage to do that?

Now I mentioned my own experience as a 14-year-old attending the Festival Hall concert.  It was a great concert and we had an absolute ball.  That’s probably because we’d been drinking ourselves silly all afternoon on the banks of the Yarra River!  So without mentioning this detail to Man-Child I, I have outlined a few rules around attending the concert.  He must have dinner at home before-hand, and he’s not to ask to stay at a mate’s place that night (which he often does).  By all means have a friend to stay, but I want him local.  For good reason as you can see!

Recent events have led me to believe it’s very important to have my men-children physically “checking-in” at home on a regular basis.  Otherwise you’ve really got no way to know what they’re up to.  Just call me Inspector Mother of a Man-Child – I feel like one half the time!